Are you an obsessive girlfriend?

Many girls in love chase their boyfriends away from them by being obsessive. What they do not realize is that a Guy needs his space too or also have a life apart from them. Obsessive behavior from a girlfriend can result in the guy abandoning her. Are you an obsessive girlfriend? 

You do not trust him completely.

You call him several times to find where he is.

You insist that he spend all his free time with you.

You keep on asking him if he loves you again and again.

You suspect that he may cheat on you if you leave him on his own.

You keep track of all his female friends.

You get upset or hurt if he is late for a date or cancels a date with you.

You insist on meeting him every day.

You feel insecure even when you see him looking or talking to other girls.

You hate it when you see him adding girls as friends in social networking Sites.

You hurt yourself when he does something you do not like.

You secretly check his mails, messages on social networking sites and even him mobile.

You try spending all your free time with him.

You feel that he is your only world.

You stalk your partner to see what he is up to.

You try changing the habits you do not like in him.

You aim at getting your guy committed to you by hook or crook even if you have just started dating.

You get angry when he makes plan so meet his friends and spend time with them even if they are guys.

You try to stop him from meeting people whom you do not like.

Does this sound like you? If yes, Stop right there. If you continue behaving the way you do he would run away from you. You cannot force someone to love you or be loyal to you. He is not your puppy or slave that you should expect him to follow you around. There is an age old saying ‘if you love someone set him free: If he comes back to you, he is yours. If he doesn't then he is not yours.’

 

Though it is perfectly natural that if you love someone you may think of him or long to be with him but if it is interrupting yours and his life then may be you are having what is called OCD or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. In case of OCD one may move from phases of attraction and anxiousness to obsession and destructing behavior. And many people confuse love with obsession. There is nothing worse than an obsessive partner. So think again, Are you an obsessive girlfriend? If you are, then avoid being so.

 

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How to Chase a Guy away from you?

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Divorce of a Generation

No one gets married with the expectation that they will divorce. While overall divorce rates continue to drop, young marriage divorce rates are increasing.  For the fourth straight year, the 20-something demographic had the highest rate of divorce out of any other age group. There’s even a name for it – the “Starter Marriage.”

There is a trend of dismisiveness. High profile marriages of celebrities and their own dismissive attitudes contribute to the whole, certainly. Anyone, including those young twenty somethings, will come through divorce with scars. They represent the consequences of a young marriage ending. They carry that baggage throughout their life and future relationships. If there are children in the relationship, they now have to face single parenthood (as well as attempting to be role models for healthy relationships.) The social stigma of divorce has dissipated, but many of the young divorcees are reporting feeling shame.  Civitas, a think tank, took a survey that gauged young people’s attitudes and ideas towards marriage. They found that 76% of those aged 20 to 24 were strongly in favor of marriage.  Part of the pull of marriage is the fact that these people are a product of divorce. They idealize what could have been, but also see divorce as a way out, also exampled for them. Wanting to do things different than your parents could be a good thing, but it is not a reason to get married and it is not the way to stay married.  It sets a couple up for failed expectations, exacerbated by celebrity marriages, divorces, and attitudes.

When the parents and grandparents of these 20-somethings got married and created families, they had vast familial and societal networks. They had the support necessary to build relationships and sustain them. There was life experience in those networks, along with examples of what worked and didn’t.  Today, society is more fragmented, and those examples just aren’t there. What’s the answer?  Many of these 20-somethings just don’t have enough life experience to know what they want, much less how to sustain a we. Some young marriages do stay together, so that is only a part of the problem.  Certainly one answer would be premarital and marital counseling. That could take up where the lack societal examples leave off. Another solution may be a break period before a divorce can happen. Perhaps jumping into divorce is the problem and a cooling off period would be a relationship saver.

The truth is relationships and marriage are hard work. We need to teach the current (and future) generations how to do the work.

This is a Guest Post from Sarah Harris.Her Wedding Planning Advice is a blog for brides that helps them stress less and enjoy the planning process. If you are looking for the perfect wedding dress, or if you need advice on how to plan a bachelorette party, Wedding Planning Advice has you covered.

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Is Marriage Toxic for Women?

Many are saying that marriage is toxic to the modern woman. Due to that general idea, many people are beginning to live together rather than marry. Elizabeth Gilbert, an author, claims that her research shows that marriage causes women to be less successful, less healthy, more depressed and more likely to die a violent death. She calls it the “Marriage Benefit Imbalance,” because men, on the other hand, benefit both physically and mentally from being married. This comes from the argument that women are not valued, like men, for their work inside the home. Men are valued for their paid work outside the home. Even Gilbert, however, ends up getting married. The “marriage Benefit Imbalance” idea was first introduced by Jessie Bernard in 1982 in The Future of Marriage. Did this book create a myth, or is it the truth? We know for sure that she thought marriage was great for men, awful for women.

Women are taking things into their own hands in response. Living together instead of marriage is one option women are choosing. Developing their “outside” careers is another. Promoting their own independence in terms of future planning and current finances. Women today are going so far as to have children via sperm donation or adoption in order to avoid the complications of  romantic relationships. All of this leads to “needing” marriage less.

Many women, however, still want to be married. They are, in general, waiting for an older age to marry. True, abusive marriages are wrong – but they are not the rule. True, many single women have wonderfully fulfilling lives. Is marriage a bad thing? Not if you know what you are getting when you marry. You need to know what marriage will and won’t do. You need to know, as a couple, what marriage will be like. What are the expectations in terms of housework, children, religion, and money? Both parties need to communicate what they want, and what they think they’re getting. If there are differences they must be worked through prior to the marriage. Getting married thinking “we’ll work it out later,” or “I can change his or her mind later,” just won’t fly. That is a recipe for disaster. A great idea would be premarital counseling to work through the issues. If you can’t agree on the issues, don’t get married.

Is marriage toxic for women? Possibly. It’s possible that it’s merely toxic for those who don’t prepare with their potential spouse properly.

This is a Guest Post from Sarah Harris. She is the Marketing Manager at Adiamor Engagement Rings. Adiamor offers a large selection of engagement ring settings, affinity diamonds and other fine diamond jewelry at affordable prices.

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Unmarried Couples living together before Marriage

Is the institution of Marriage under threat? Is marriage losing its sanctity and importance?  With the increasing popularity of Live in Relationships where unmarried couples live together under one roof there are reasons why one may think so. Live in Relationships are no more looked at with awe.

Marriage is an institution created by our forefathers where two adults of opposite sex get into a life time agreement which is socially and legally accepted. This arrangement fulfills the requirement of companionship, loyalty, children and even the sharing of responsibilities etc. Now with live in relationships becoming a popular trend many seem to wonder that when you can have almost everything without getting married in a living together relationship why bother with marriage at all.

I talked with a friend who got married after 2 years live in relationship with a guy who is 10 years younger to her because she was so hurt by her first marriage which ended in divorce and also unsure if a relationship with an younger guy would succeed. I hoped to hear that she is very happy with her marriage. But what I heard shocked me. She revealed that when they were in a live in relationship she would often have the guy springing surprises for her by way of surprise dates, gifts or gestures but after marriage she feels the romance is gone and that she is taken for granted. He also happily used to share the work at home and now he seems to have become a lazy bum making her struggle with both home and office work. Before marriage he used to make sure to please her sexual needs and never minded to perform an oral on her. Now he seems to have completely changed making her wonder if she did a mistake by getting married.

There are many reasons why live in relationships are getting more popular by day. Some of the advantages of unmarried couples living together are

Sex

Sharing of house hold chores and bills

No more loneliness

Romance is in the air

Support and Companionship

Freedom without surrendering rights or accepting obligations

Freedom to opt out if things are not working or you are no longer interested

No Financial Complications or Legal Hassles

While the live in arrangement clearly lacks the commitment and acceptability from society and a nurturing atmosphere for children it is ideal for people who want to know each other and experience how a future marriage partnership could be. It is like seeing the movie trailer before buying the movie ticket. And if in case the period of togetherness fails to deepen mutual love and signs of compatibility both will be free to go their own way without any bitterness and legal formalities. It is also popular with guys and girls who want to have their personal freedom without been chained in a relationship. But in many cases women are forced into a live in relationship with promise to marry only to be abandoned later after the man had his fill of her. Thankfully in India, women in live-in relationships were legally protected under the domestic violence act and in January 2008 the Supreme Court also has validated long-term live-in relationships as ‘marriages’ which has attracted a lot of controversy.

However, if two consenting unmarried adults find a live in arrangement happier, who are we to complain. After all, every individual has the right to choose his or her own happiness. 

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Why do women change after marriage?

Why do women change so much after marriage? This is a question many guys would like an answer to. Men often complain that when a woman is a girlfriend she would accepts you the way you are including your friend's, your likes, your music, your gadgets etc. But after you get married the same woman tries to change every thing about you. But after few years of marriage she says “You know you are not the same guy I married to". I guess that is because love is blind and that reality was not as attractive as we thought. I remember reading an answer to this question at a forum that females try to change there husbands after marriage because they could not get the man they wanted so they were trying to make changes in the man they got to meet what they wanted. Well, it is sad but true to a greater extent with many women.

Marriage is a life changing event for Women. Girls move out of their parent’s house and move into the household of their husbands. The girl also become more mature, responsible and disciplined once she is married. A woman not only has to adjust with the life in the new household where ever it is but also lose her old identity. Not all Women get to keep their maiden name after marriage. They give up their maiden names and take their husbands' surname upon marriage because that is expected of a woman in our society.

For most women marriage is the end of a lot of things. Some of them are their own likes, friends and seeing their own parents. I have seen several females who transform themselves to fit into their husband’s household. A college friend of mine who was very modern and stylish is now married to a businessman in Surat and she now wears a Saree and even covers her head. I have seen women giving up their jobs because the husband or in-laws did not approve of their sons wife working. Many women give up eating non vegetarian when they are married into a vegetarian household. Apart from that many of us find it difficult to communicate or meet our old friends or our own parents because of our new priorities.

We also see the transformation of a proud Miss Perfect 10 to a careless Mrs. Fat Aunt with in few years of marriage. A few months back I have been to my cousin’s place at Pune and was surprised to see that my sister in law has become so fat I could barely recognize her.  She said that she is so busy with the household chores that she has no time for exercise. She also revealed to me that since she did not want the food to go waste she mostly consumed the leftovers. No doubt she became so fat. Many women like her also tend to think that “I have found a partner for life, now who else I need to attract?” In fact a woman becomes so comfortable with the fact that they do not have to leave your bed early in the morning for an exercise or sacrifice a favorite dessert to cut down calorie intake. Most women also do their best to impress their spouses with the cooking skills with foods that may taste good but make be unhealthy. Because of unhealthy life style most women also find it difficult to shed the weight they put on during pregnancy.

Ladies, you got married does not mean that you do not have to look attractive anymore. In fact, if you want to keep your man from going to another woman and stay glued to you then better take care of your looks and health. What do you say?

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Pheromones Colognes for attracting Men or Women

Pherone V-5 Cologne for Men to attract Women

Can a Cologne get a Man to attract Women or Vice versa? The founders of Pherone who are scientists with years of hands-on laboratory research experience in biochemistry, developmental biology and genetic engineering says that it is possible with their products. They even have developed specialized colognes for gays and lesbians.

According to an Article in CNN ‘Though any number of animals and insects use pheromones to communicate with each other about important things such as food, territory and sex, the idea that humans are similarly influenced too.’ Pheromones are substances which, when inhaled, can produce reactions like sexual attraction, relaxation, excitement or even euphoria. Pheromone is a natural sexual attractant the body produces to subconsciously attract the opposite sex. Certain people are always the center of attention, even though they aren't particularly handsome or beautiful. The reason may be their natural pheromones. It is said Men or women can improve sex appeal and romance with Pheromone Products.

So if you want to boost your romance and love life then Cologne with Pheromones may be the answer to that. Why not give it a try if the sparks are missing in your marriage or you are in a sexless marriage to change the situation? After all, who do not want to attract their partner?

Check out Pheromones based Products

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How to Make a Good Impression at Work Place

There is a saying that the “First Impression is the best impression”. So we don’t get a second chance to make a good first impression. If you are on your first job or if it is your first day on a new job you may find it awkward to mix up with people. But remember that your first few days or weeks at the work place can be an indicator to how the rest of your job goes. If you manage to get good first impressions from your Boss and coworkers it would make fitting in to your job in the company much easier. Sometimes we manage to make a good first impression especially with subordinates even before we meet them because of our ranking.

We all want to make a good impression at work and get noticed by our Boss and subordinates. But unfortunately, many of us even after working in several Organizations still do not have much idea on Office Etiquettes which is very important if we want to make a lasting good impression. A good book on Office Etiquettes can be of great help to know what to do and what not to do at work. And talking of Manners or Etiquettes who can be better to talk about that than the Best Selling Author Emily Post?

Here are some tips which may help

Follow Office Etiquettes. Good Manners are important if you want to make a good impression as people notice what you wear, what you say, your body language or how you behave etc.

Gaining knowledge about the Company and its activities before the first day at work can help you to start contributing and becoming part of the team faster.

Be more of a Listener at least the first few days of the work as your main motto for the week would be gaining as much as knowledge about the company and colleagues. This is a good time to build a good rapport. Being a skilled listener can make a very good impression at work.

Find a mentor who can show you the ropes and give you additional insight into your new job and company.

Make sure you learn the name of peoples at work fast.

Have a Positive attitude at work. If you do not have one develop it as No one likes negative people.

Keep your eyes and ears open. But be neutral and never be a contributor to office gossip. Do not indulge in bad humor or sarcastic remarks. Also avoid conversation on topics like politics, religion, health problems and other personal issues.

Do not boast about you or your achievements otherwise you would have people running away from you or making fun of you behind your back. Let your work speak for you.

Do not take more work than you can handle at least in the beginning months as failure in commitments can cost you dearly. It is always best to under promise and over deliver.

Make your colleagues feel important and you would be opening the doors to opportunities for friendships, jobs, love relationships, networking and sales.

You may make a mistake at work. But show the guts by taking the responsibility and coming with a solution to fix the mistake than putting the blame on others.

And Finally, Manage your time efficiently. You are paid to work. So work during the work timings.  

 

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Should I stay in my Marriage or Opt out?

“Should I stay in my Marriage or Opt out?” is one question I have been asked several times. I think that is a Question they have to ask themselves and not me. No matter what anyone has to say on the subject one has to weigh the pros and cons of the relationship and then make a decision on whether they need to save their marriage or they would want to get a Divorce.

Many couples who took their time in choosing their partner and getting into marriage unfortunately do not put much effort to salvage a relationship when it gets sour. Instead they choose the cowards way out and decide that Divorce is the answer for their martial problems even when it is possible to fix the problems between couples. Also many tend to overlook their own mistakes and point fingers at their partners. I have always been a firm believer of ‘what you give is what you get’ principle and that is not wrong too. If someone is behaving to us in a particular manner then most likely we are responsible for that. So before pointing fingers at your spouse first think what you are doing wrong and fix it. Maybe that could help you to save your Marriage. Think of what you would lose or gain if you stick on to the marriage before making the decision to opt out.

You have invested a lot on your marriage, so do not give up without an attempt to salvage it by understanding what is wrong and then fixing it.

If your Partner is in need of help to get rid of addictions or abusive behavior get him help.

Consider those who would be affected by your Divorce like your Children and Parents.

Communicate with your Partner because many times we can’t see what we are doing wrong. Also talk about your dreams and expectations from the relationship.

Try changing things you are doing wrong and being a better partner.

Love can move mountains. Send some unconditional love your partner’s way.

Spend time with your Spouse and make your spouse know that you value the relationship.

Do not ignore the warning signs that may affect your marriage negatively. Try to fix them without delay.

Show your partner that you love him/her and genuinely care for the relationship to run smoothly.

Appreciate your partner when they do something good.

Even Sexless Marriages can survive. But never reach a stage when you are not touching each other. If not sex at least keep the touch on.

Remember, your happiness depends on you. It is a state of mind you have to develop. Do not depend too much on your spouse to make you happy or meet your needs. Find ways to do it yourself.

Do not let Relationship Boredom creep into your Marriage.

Before giving up your Marriage completely visit a Marriage Councilor for help to salvage your Marriage.

And finally after giving some time and energy to make your Marriage work ask yourself “Would you be happy with him/her or without them in your life”

Are you going to save your marriage and stop your Divorce or opt out of the relationship? Now you know what you need to do and where you need to go.

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Staying in Marriage for better or Worse

You do not go to bed one night with a happy marriage and then wake up in the morning with an unhappy one. Things reached there gradually because you ignored the warning signs of relationships trouble or did not give it much importance. Even after the relationship has turned sour many couples still stay in their marriages. It would not be wrong to say that there are many who stay glued to their Marriages because for them marriage is a life time commitment and they are married for better or worse.

If that is not the reason for staying in a miserable marriage it can be

For the sake of Children

For financial security

For Society, Family or Religion

Legal Obligations

Low self esteem

Not want to be like the divorced parents

Not wanting to be single again

…… and more

Many of these reasons make women to stay in their marriages even if they are miserable or have a sexless marriage. However, it is possible to salvage a relationship and save a marriage if efforts are put to understand what is wrong and try to fix the same.

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Unhappy Marriage and the Astrological Connection

Unhappy Marriage? Delay in Marriage? Martial Infidelity? The Horoscope of the Individuals may have an answer to this. 

In India Hindus normally do an analysis of horoscopes using the Match Making system of Indian Vedic Astrology in detail to know the mutual compatibility of both the girl and boy before planning the marriage. This analysis considers factors like Longevity, Health, Nature and Character, Progeny and Sterility, Wealth Status, Profession Status and Sexual compatibility of both male and female. A reading of your horoscope and your partner's horoscope can tell what the fate of your marriage is. The positioning of Moon and Mars in the girls horoscope is very vital and the position of sun for the boy while looking into the horoscope. The 8 primary considerations made while comparing the horoscopes are Varna, Vasya, Dina, Yoni, Graha Mitra, Gana, Rasi and Nadi. There are points allocated to them which is the same as the numerical order in which they have been dealt with above like 1 point for Varna , 2 points for Vasya and so on down to Nadi with 8 points. The points of agreement between the horoscopes are then added together. If the total of points is found to be less than 18 out of the possible 36 the marriage should not take place for it would result in danger, disagreement or early death of the partners.

An Astrological analysis of some factors in the Horoscope can give indications of an unhappy marriage. They are

An analysis of the Placement and strength of the 7th lord and its relationship with other planets.

The 7th house denoting the spouse and the relationship between the lords of 1st and 7th houses. 

Position and strength of Venus in the Horoscope.

Position of Mars in the birth chart.

The 2nd, 5th and 12th houses in the Horoscope Chart and their lords.

If your marriage is in trouble then doing a Horoscope Analysis by a Qualified Astrologer can help you find what is wrong and do remedies prescribed by Astrology to set things right.

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Domestic Violence against Women in India

There is not even a single day when we do not hear or read about Domestic violence against women. Be it the cruelty of husbands and in laws for dowry or burning the brides irrespective of culture or background women in India are becoming victims of this crime. If we thought that the economic backward or uneducated are those who fall victims to this crime it is not so. The submissive quality in women in India and the general mindset of the society that women are physically and emotionally weaker than the males makes them vulnerable to domestic violence. It is said that in India there is a crime against women in every three minutes.

Who is responsible for domestic violence? The answer is all of us. For us unless it happens to us or someone who is close to us incidents of domestic violence are just news or entertainment. Many of us even when we see or hear such instances even in our neighborhood do not interfere or do anything to stop them. I have already written in this blog about a friend who committed suicide because of the cruelty of her husband and in-laws. Though majority of the people in the nearby flats were aware of this none opened their mouths to ensure that the culprit got punished. Their getting involved would have meant enmity with the neighbor and frequent visits to police or courtrooms which they did not want to happen. If everybody behaves like this and shields the criminals how is this crime going to stop? What is even more annoying is the fact that most victims also prefer to keep silence and do not report such instances. I have personally seen women taking beatings from their husbands without even a word of resistance. For an Indian woman husband has the place of God. How can we expect domestic violence to stop continuing in India when women are still reluctant to report domestic violence to the police and suffer as if it is their duty to their husbands?

What exactly is domestic violence? It is the violence happening within the home towards a family member and can be physical, sexual or emotional in nature. However, domestic violence against women is the most common of all. What we need to understand is if this has happened to a neighbor’s daughter today it can happen with someone close to us tomorrow. As Women need to empower themselves through education and achieve economic independence and freedom. We also need to stop suffering in silence and fight for our rights when someone does wrong to us. If we women do not stand up for ourselves who will? We need to change to see the world change.

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Can a Boyfriend Arm Pillow take away your loneliness?

It is at a friend’s house that I got introduced to a fantastic product called Boyfriend Arm Pillow also known as a Man Arm Pillow. As the name indicates it is a sleep pillow which is filled with foam and dressed in a soft cotton shirt which has an arm and a soft fleecy hand that wraps around you as you sleep. This pillow resembles the torso of a big strong man with a comforting arm that cuddles you while you sleep or take rest providing a secure sense of comfort. When you are in bed to sleep it is the comfort you want which one can definitely find in this pillow. It won’t snore or complain that the hand is hurting after all. If you do not have a man or if your guy is away on nights a man body pillow can be a great companion. I agree that this pillow is really cool as I too got one after seeing it but is it a real solution to get rid of loneliness? I guess not.

What is loneliness? As per wikipedia "Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation." Have we not heard “Lonely even in the midst of a crowd’? Loneliness is something which an individual chooses so if the person wants to come out of loneliness he or she has to put the efforts too. One needs to put an effort to communicate and be social to conquer loneliness. Also understanding your exact problems and rectifying it can make your journey easier. Some things which can help get rid of loneliness are

Making new friends

Communicating with friends and relatives

Getting involved in your Hobbies

Learning new things which interest you

Do things that excite you

Play with pets or children

…

In short, if you want to conquer loneliness you need to make a decision that you do not want to be lonely and work towards it.

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Why some Women are attracted to Older Men

Many times we see women dating or married to guys who are older enough to be their fathers. While we may understand why older wealthy and successful men may want in a younger partner we wonder what is in for younger women in such a relationship. While a man maybe fascinated by young women for reasons like beauty, excitement or an ego boost what is that attracts a woman?

Older Men are known to be more financially stable than younger men as they have had a longer time to work on it. It also means that he may be able to give her a secure and more comfortable life.

Older men have paternal instincts and may pamper you more and also be an authority figure in her life and take change of things better.Most women want to marry someone like their father whom they have adored when they were young.

The Older Guy is more matured compared to his younger counterpart.Younger men still have a sense of immaturity about them.

Older Men are found to be more disciplined and responsible. An Older Man is someone a lady can depend or lean on.

Older Men seem to be more devoted to their partners and normally do not run around flirting or sleeping around with a bunch of women.

Older men normally know what they want as they have experienced the good and the bad in their life so they pretty much know what they are looking for.

Older men may not have the same energy as a younger man so they need not be pleased sexually every day. He also because of his experience knows to please a woman sexually so what may lack in quality would be compensated with quality.

He is more knowledgeable because of his experience.Because of this wisdom an older man can teach her and make her feel more secure and confident.

Since he mostly has a secured career and finances he can be supportive of the younger partner’s ambitions. He may also want his partner to do what he personally could not do himself because of his limitations earlier in life.

Since he already may have been through a lot of relationships or heart breaks that he knows well what it takes to make the relationship work. So he may not commit the mistakes younger men do and can keep the girl happier.

He might not be interested in making babies as he may already have a couple of them.

If it is none of the Qualities which attract a younger woman to an older man then it may be because

She is genuinely in love with him

Or

She is a Gold Digger who is with him for his Money.

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Younger Women Seeking Older Men for Marriage or Dating Beware!

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What should a Guy not do on a first date

Today when I was chatting with a guy on a social networking site he asked me what to do on a first date as he seems to be having a problem when it comes to girls. So here I am with a post on what not to do to impress a girl on a first date instead.

If you are a Guy and do not want your first date to be the final date you need to make a good impression during the time with the girl. If you genuinely want to sabotage the first date here are some things that may help you to do so.

Arrive late for the date and do not offer an explanation or apology.

Do not compliment her.

If you are meeting an online friend for date you should give her a 10+ year old picture of you so that she could recognize you.

Do not dress well or use any Personal Hygiene or Grooming Products.

Do not insist on picking up the tab or make an excuse of forgetting the wallet.

Leave no Tips or offer pennies as tip to the waiter. The girl will get an idea how generous you would be with her if she gets into a relationship with you.

Forget your Manners and Etiquette. Be Bossy, rude, talk rubbish and do not allow the girl to talk or interrupt when she talks.

Brag about your ex girlfriend and possessions.

Insult the girl or call her names.

Spend 90% of the time talking or text on your mobile phone, Smoking Cigarette and making frequent trips to the washroom.

Look at other girls and comment on how hot they are.

Complain or grumble about anything and everything.

Arrive drunk or get drunk and faint leaving the poor girl to pay the bills and taking the responsibility of making sure you reach your home safely.

Ask your date about personal things like sexual likings and fantasies, salary etc.

Tell the girl that she is sexy and hot, she is turning you on and that you want to get to bed with her.

Well, I guess this list of what not to do is enough to ruin a first date and chase a girl away from you. Now it is upto you what impression you would want to make on a first date, whether you want to impress or chase her away.

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Are you Happy being a Single Woman?

There are several single men and women who are just happy the way they are and do not want to get married. Jennifer Schefft even have a wonderful Book written on this subject titled Better Single than Sorry where she says that being single is definitely not a curse and that how no woman should settle for anything less than Mr. Right. Many women feel worthless if they do not have a boyfriend or they could not get married in the mid twenties. I do not think there is anything bad in being Single. In fact there are numerous advantages of being Single.

You are not accountable to a Boyfriend or Husband.

You do not have to worry if your spouse is cheating on you.

You can spend your money the way you like.

You do not have to worry about the responsibility which comes along with being in a relationship.

You do not have to share your things with anyone.

You can wear what you like.

You can do or eat want you like.

You have more time for your hobbies, likings and interest.

Nobody would question you if you want to be with your family or friends.

The list can go on…

Do not think that I am saying that all women should stay single. My point is just that there is nothing to feel distressed about being a Single no matter what your family or society has to say about it. You can be alone and be happy too even if it is for the rest of the life, it is not that bad. But it is definitely a bad idea to sacrifice all of the benefits of being single for a guy who isn't worth it. I think women should aim at getting educated and empowered first than thinking of walking down the aisle as soon as attaining the marriageable age. Marriage is just not the magic remedy to all your problems.

Another friend of mine who had a painful divorce fully agrees with me. She even goes a step further and declares that if you are thinking of marrying for sex then Vibrator is a better choice than a Man.

As I write this I can’t help remembering a college friend of mine who married the guy she loved against the wishes of her parents at the age of 18. She was a very brilliant student at school and college and did not continue her studies. After 10 years and 2 kids later the guy she got married to abandon her for another woman. Her parents accepted her back but she and her children now live at the mercy of her parents. Her own brothers and sister in laws are not very supportive of her. I only wish if she studied further or learned something to enable her to earn a decent living.

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Why a Vibrator is a better choice than a Man

Being single and happy, is it Possible?

Ten Reasons to get married

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10 Great Gift Ideas for Single Women on Valentines Day

I am Single and I am Happy

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Why some Men do not want to get married

A friend of mine was in a relationship with her boyfriend for the past 4 years and was hopeful that one day they would get married. They have been good friends and had great sex but whenever she discussed about marriage he always avoided the topic saying that everything is great the way it is and why spoil things by getting married. In fact I have never met this guy in person though I have been in constant touch with my friend all these years. After reading one of my articles titled Why Should Girls Not Sleep Around she called me and asked if she could speak to me. Then she said it all. She told me that she feels that she had made a mistake of giving her virginity to a guy who was not ready to commit. She told that even though they were sexually active and meet every weekend they rarely went to places where his or her friends would frequent. One time when they accidentally bumped into his friend and girlfriend he introduced her as his good friend. Last year she also went to his parent’s 30^th wedding anniversary party at his parent’s place where she was treated like any of his other friends. She told him that she wanted to get married but her boyfriend just did not want to get married. When she pressurized he dumped her and she ended up with a broken heart.

I am sure that my friend’s boyfriend is not the only one who is scared of commitment. Many men are okay with the idea of dating women but when it comes to commitment they back off. Some men are afraid to commit while some just do not want to commit. What can be some reasons why men keep away from commitment or marriage?

His Parents or close relatives have failed marriages and he is scared that his own marriage would end up a failure.

He is not financially stable and cannot afford the expenses that come along with the marriage.

He is scared of losing his freedom and independence. He is happy with his single status. He does not want to shoulder responsibilities that come along with Marriage including that of children.

He is not willing to put the time and money required to build a good marriage. He is happy in a ‘no ties’ relationship.

He is afraid of losing control or power by getting married.

He is scared of even the thought of being accountable to someone.

He is afraid that he may lose space by accepting another person in life and the chances that she may dominate him.

One sex partner forever scares him to death.

He has some goals in life he want to achieve like a sisters marriage or promotion in job or anything of that kind and does not want marriage coming between his goals.

He gets everything he wants from you even without commitment.

Maybe he is already committed but was with you just for fun.

Maybe he never loved you and was with you only for sex.

This list can go on......

While I sympathize with my friend for what happened to her I also feel angry as to why she did not recognize the signs that this guy was just not meant for her and the fact that he was only using her. I would have been happy if she was the one who dumped him. If you have to coerce a man to commit to you or acknowledge you in public you are definitely with the wrong man and you are better off without him.

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How to know if your Girlfriend or Boyfriend really loves you?

Many women and men in love also want to know if their love is reciprocated. Just because your girl or guy said ‘I love you’ does not mean that they genuinely love you. A man or woman may say such words even without meaning anything or because they have an ulterior motive or want to get you trapped. While a man may use promises of love and marriage to get intimate with the girl and a woman may do so for money. In such a case how can you know if your boyfriend or girlfriend really loves you?

Haven’t we heard of men who after getting the girls pregnant even refused to acknowledge them? Have we not heard about guys whom when the girls refuse sex spoil their reputation or abandon them? Have we not heard about girls who after taking away money, jewelry or property from the guys abandoned them when he is not capable of giving anything else? It is quite difficult when someone is quite skillful at relationships and may make you feel wonderful and leave you overwhelmed by your own conclusions that he or she is in love with you. But if you watch him or her carefully you may find signs to identify if your husband or boyfriend is in love with you or not. The behavior and body language of the person can give you signs regarding the level of commitment of a person. So do not be fooled by the words of love or commitment as soon as you hear it.

Related Article Links

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Why Should Girls Not Sleep Around?

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How to know if your Boyfriend or Girlfriend has lost interest in you?

Relationship is a two way street and it takes the efforts of both the partners to keep it alive. It takes more efforts to maintain a relationship than getting into it. There is always a probability that any relationship can change and one or both of the partners lose love or interest in the other person to stay in the relationship. It is said that if you can fall in love you can fall out of love too. If or not your Boyfriend or Girlfriend has lost interest in you is something which you would be able to know based on his or her behavior or body language. Sometimes even the best of relationships can die down and everything you put up together will go down the drain. However, as long as it is not too late efforts can be put to salvage the relationship and bring back the feelings of love into the relationship. But it is very important to know if your man/woman is losing interest in you so that you can prepare yourself from the inevitable. How to know if your Boyfriend or Girlfriend has lost interest in you? There can be many signs that your relationship is in trouble, your boyfriend or girlfriend may have lost interest in you and may want to dump you.

Does he or she make excuses just not to see you or spend time with you regularly? 
You don’t go out anymore or do things like hugging or holding hands anymore? 
Does your partner ignore you not only in public but in private as well? 
Does he or she have excuses when you try to be intimate? 
Have his/her friends started being aloof with you or are avoiding you? 
Is your gut feeling telling you that something just isn’t right with your partner? 
Is your partner suddenly become more critical of you and the things you do? 
Is your partner irritated by things he / she used to love about you earlier? 
She or he no longer is bothered by the fact that you two aren’t getting together as much anymore. 
There is a major change in your boyfriend or girlfriends behavior and you even avoid communicating. 
Your partner no longer notices you the way he/she used to do earlier? 

Did you find any signs of infidelity in your partner? If you have seen any of these Signs from your loved one, Beware! Your Relationship is in trouble.

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